Nov 20 2008
Movie News (Nov 20th, 2008)
___________________________________________________________
The Capt Gets a Capt
Joe Johnston has been picked to helm the director’s chair for the Captain America film, The First Avenger: Captain America. With a background in Lucas Arts and moving on to do a fantastic job with October Sky, Johnston has a pretty incredible track record with visual effects films, although we’ll keep quiet about the crotch-punt that was Jurassic Park III.
Along with the director being picked, The Chronicles of Narnia scribes Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeely are in negotiations for helming the script. I’m worried that this might be too big a film for them to handle (being a World War II piece). You might say, “Junk, Narnia was a huge film.” Then I would sigh and smile, shaking my head, retorting, “Did you even watch the movies?” You then turn away bashfully, “Well, I stayed through the first hour of the first movie,” and I would clap you on the back of the head and laugh like a mad Russian superhero with a gigantic left forearm of doom, saying, “Yes, Yes, I would rather be anally raped by barb wire squirrels as well, my friend.” Then we’d go get coffee.
So far the official synopsis of the film has been:
“Born during the Great Depression, Steve Rogers grew up a frail youth in a poor family. Horrified by the newsreel footage of the Nazis in Europe, Rogers was inspired to enlist in the army. However, because of his frailty and sickness, he was rejected. Overhearing the boy’s earnest plea, General Chester Phillips offered Rogers the opportunity to take part in a special experiment… Operation: Rebirth. After weeks of tests, Rogers was at last administered the ‘Super-Soldier Serum’ and bombarded by ‘vita-rays.’ Steve Rogers emerged from the treatment with a body as perfect as a body can be and still be human. Rogers was then put through an intensive physical and tactical training program. Three months later, he was given his first assignment as Captain America. Armed with his indestructible shield and and battle savvy, Captain America has continued his war against evil both as a sentinel of liberty and leader of the Avengers.”
___________________________________________________________
He-Man Not Dead. John Stevenson Gets Head.
I’m liking these titles. About 3 months ago I posted on my previous blog site about the killing off of ahref=”http://www.slate.com/id/2141626/”>He Man’s latest script property. It seemed that the backlash of a few script reviews were too much to handle. The script was called dark and edgy with poor character development and weak story telling. I laughed. I laughed hardily about it.
But now, it would seem that He Man is getting a new director to head the film adaptation of the 80s cult icon. John Stevenson, the director of Kung Fu Panda, supposedly “went in to the Silver offices, came in and did this killer take on He-man and the Masters of the Universe and got himself the job.”
While Stevenson has an impressive background in animation and puppetry, does he have what it takes to take charge of a grisly and dark version of an 80s cartoon muscle-bound latent homosexual? (This begs an entirely different post at some point)
Now…to leave off this somewhat intelligent conversation with some crude, toilet humor. Yay. Squirrels with barbwire and salt packets.
