JUNKFILM

Darth Vader Don’t Get No Money

Actor David Prowse, the man behind the mask of Darth Vader from the original Star Wars films, says he has yet to see any residual payments from the Return of the Jedi, because… get this… it hasn’t made any money yet. David speaks on this:

“I get these occasional letters from Lucasfilm saying that we regret to inform you that as Return of the Jedi has never gone into profit, we’ve got nothing to send you. Now here we’re talking about one of the biggest releases of all time,” said Prowse. “I don’t want to look like I’m bitching about it,” he said, “but on the other hand, if there’s a pot of gold somewhere that I ought to be having a share of, I would like to see it.”
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IT remake to be R-Rated

Screenwriter Dave Kajganich tells Dread Central that the big screen remake of Stephen King’s It will be “set in the mid-1980s and in the present almost equally — mirroring the twenty-odd-year gap King uses in the book.” the film will also be more R area for rating than the original made for TV film.
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Rourke makes good on promise

The Wrestler star Mickey Rourke did in fact show up at WWE WresltMania 25 after promoting himself before the Academy Awards in February, and was in the audience during Chris Jericho’s handicap match. After defeating all three of his opponents, Jericho challenged Rourke to come into the ring. And as expected, Rourke stepped over the guard rail, climbed into the squared circle, and laid a few punches on the WWE star.
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Star Trek rated PG-13

Yup….rating was passed.
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Freddy is cast!!

Variety has confirmed Watchmen star Jackie Earle Haley, i.e. Rorschach, has signed on to play Freddy Kruger in the A Nightmare on Elm Street reboot. Also, BloodyDisgusting has learned that Kyle Gallner (The Haunting In Connecticut) is in final talks to play Quentin, the Johnny Depp character from the original Wes Craven film.
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Iron Man 2: Not Demon in a Bottle, but close

Robert Downy Jr gave an interview this weekend and the Iron Man news was a flooding. While most fans thought part 2 was going to go the route of the Demon in a Bottle story arc, one of the most famous of the Iron Man legacy, Downy says otherwise:

“I think [Demon in a Bottle is] probably best saved, because it’s such its own storyline,” Downey told MTV. “We’re going for the interim space [between the origin and Demon], which is more a look behind the mask of someone who says he’s Iron Man and what it really is to become a superhero.”
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Zack Snyder’s Director’s Cut…in cinemas?

Zack Snyder, director of The Watchmen has been quoted about the director’s cut:

“We’re super proud of the movie, the director’s cut is coming soon. So in July you’ll get to see more Watchmen. If you didn’t have enough in two hours and forty minutes you’ll have three hours and ten minutes, and I think there is three hours and thirty minutes coming so they’ll be a lot more Watchmen to come, regardless of how people feel about it.”

Will we see it in theaters?

“I think that’s still happening. I think they’re still going to do a limited run of it, or they’re still talking about it anyway.”
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Film Munkey ep 2 almost complete

The second, more experimental episode of Film Munkey is well underway in the post production stages. At this time, we’re about 80% done with the episode, so it looks positive to see it up and showing hopefully next week (if nothing falls apart, lol).
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This post’s A.P. (awesomeness personified) goes to ThinkGeek for this little wonderment of wonderful. A child’s size sleeping bag, TaunTaun! How freaking awesome. I await your “And I thought they smelled bad on the outside” jokes.

Here I am again, at work with nothing to do but watch Netflix Instant
movies (how is that for product promotion!) and lo and behold, I found
the perfect movie to review. I’m going to do this a little differently
this time. Instead of watching the movie and keeping my thoughts to
myself (although SB will beg to differ. I always talk in the middle of
movies and ask questions and yell at the people and generally piss
everyone off around me. But hey, I do what I want!) I’m going to do a
review WHILE I’m watching the movie. So it’ll be like you, gentle
reader, are sitting there next to me, catching my play by play in
person. You bring the popcorn (I love it, even though you get kernels
stuck in between your teeth and it hurts so bad and you just keep
picking at it and when you finally get it it’s like, “Hell yeah! I
totally owned that popcorn kernel shell! Take note, the rest of you.
Don’t test me!”) Cue it up!

So the opening song is pretty awesome. Brittany Snow… that’s a name
I know. She looks familiar too, but don’t know. Maybe she’s related to
Hayden Panties… they look alike. Save the Cheerleader! I love Hiro.
He’s so funny. He’s on Scrubs, too. Small world, I guess.

Oh, look at that. She stumbles into a dark house, somehow does not
notice her father covered in blood. She yells, “Hello? I’m home!” And
the killer, who is probably still lurking in the house, somehow does
not hear her incessant mumbling. There’s a nice array of catchy puns -
“I almost killed myself on this baseball bat!” (Har, har.) There’s the
killer. Why doesn’t he look under the bed? If I were a killer, I’d be
all looking under every bed in that house, even the ones that are
really low to the ground, because some bitches be all skinny and can
fit under those, too. Or look on the ceiling - sometimes they hide
there, too. Sneaky ninja people who are all sneaky. Butthole.

Skip ahead. She’s getting ready for prom, apparently it’s a big deal.
Hm. Should she take her pills? No… that’ll just make the date rape
she’s hoping will happen tonight that much less memorable. Jump scare.
Loving aunt (who is Hayden Panties mom in Heroes, how weird) is saying
“I know you’re all grown up and stuff, so it’s time for you to wear
your mom’s shawl that matches that dress you just bought perfectly!”
“Oh no, I am not worthy.” “Oh yes, you are. Now wear it.” Yeah, blonde
main character, maybe it’ll cover that huge scar in the middle of your
forehead. It’s usually nice to see actors and actresses with
imperfections, but in this case, I just want to take one of those
cement spreading things and fill it in with liquid latex or Maybelline
foundation.

So we find out later that the killer, who looks much too similar to
Charles Manson (who is kind of sexy, BTW, for a short, insane
homicidal maniac who looks like he needed a haircut two year ago and a
good shave) is an old science teacher that loves her and escapes from
prison through the ultra secure, highly complex ceiling panels in his
cell.

What do we have here? Typical high school prom scenes - drama between
the couples, cramps that are fixed with Midol, friends gossiping,
creepy teacher lurking in the dark waiting to kill or fuck the girl
(still don’t know her name) we’re not exactly sure which one. Friend
goes missing, she’s dead but no one knows but us. (Girl says “Michael
you’re going to lose her if you keep acting like this.” Boyfriend of
dead girl says, “Yeah. I doubt that.” Lol. Funny, clever writing.)
Serious relationship talks about the future, when they haven’t even
had sex yet. Teenage boys acting a bit drunk, even though they’re
drinking pop from rocks glasses.

This is too much. I’m wearing myself out. There’s too much to say. The
dialogue is unnatural, it seems over exaggerated. He spent FOUR hours
picking out a flower for her. They went $100,000 over budget. Did you
hear that? The party planner went $100,000 over budget? My prom was at
a hotel with gross food and a stupid little plastic arch. Woo-hoo. It
probably cost about $3000 total. What does a $100,000 prom look like?
Oh, apparently a red carpet event. See all those people that just
REALLY want to go to prom with these over privileged high school
assholes. Everything is very cliche. You know where this is going
because it’s a story you’ve heard a million times before. The acting
is way sub-par. It’s jump scare galore - I haven’t seen one thing
that’s frightened me legitimately. But it’s still kind of enjoyable to
watch… in the same way a train wreck is fun to watch. For a dumb,
mindless background movie… this movie is worth a watch. But only if
you’re in some catatonic state or have your eyes taped open as some
weird sort of visual mind games and torture. Otherwise, don’t watch
it. Netflix should be ashamed! Shame!!