JUNKFILM

One of the more quirky and original trailers I’ve seen in a while is Men Who Stare At Goats.

Ritiland and I were talking tonight and she yelled at me in that really piercingly annoying anime voice asking why I haven’t updated in a while. I immediately made fun of Will Ferrel movies and that seemed to shut her up. Well, that and a swift Samuel L Jackson backhand to the pie-hole.

And it got me thinking. Why haven’t I updated? I usually look through the news sites and see what I think it relevant to talk about and that makes the posts happen. But today, I figure I will do something different, and in all honesty, something I would like to do more of. Instead of simply giving a review or retelling the news and posting trailers, how about I give some of my opinions… it’s ok, dear reader, it’s dark at first, but soon… soon you’ll see the light.

Everyone has guilty pleasures. From singing in the car on the drive home to horrible radio music or a history of LARPing. These are things we usually don’t blurt out in public or even to some of our closest friends. These are our guilty pleasures. What are mine, you ask, dear reader? Well, I will not divulge some of the more risque ones, but suffice to say I will throw my hat into the ring for films. My top 5 favorite guilty pleasure films:

#5. Death Race 2008

Yes, I know it’s a remake and if you have read more than one entry on this blog you will know how much I loathe the very existence of 99% of remakes. And truth be told, when I saw this movie trailer I was laughing so hard the guy in the Abercrombie shirt sitting next to me got offended because obviously this was a movie he intended on shelling out the cash for. I had absolutely no interest in watching it…
Until one day at work when my co-worker threw it in the DVD player and I just stopped working all together and watched the movie quite intently. Ok, let me state this off the bat, this is by far not a good movie. In fact, none of the the movies on this list will be “good” movies. That’s why they are guilty pleasures. This is also why you won’t see Kurosawa films on here either, these are bad movies that I love… and let me stress bad.
The movie, albeit horrible as a film, was fucking fun as hell. Car chasing the way it should be done. Not on some silly street where turns are made to get away from someone else, but rather with machine guns and lots of decapitations and bodies being crushed. What makes this such a fun movie to watch? It’s a live action video game cut scene. In fact, it’s the best video game cut scene I’ve ever seen. Some people tell me that it’s just really a movie, but I disagree, no one would make this a movie, but as a video game cut scene it’s magical. It’s Mario Kart come to life… with death.
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#4. Pool Hall Junkies

Now, ever since I first saw Poolhall, I knew it was not a good film. The acting on most parts is …. reeeeeaaaally bad. But the script is fun and the story is just a blast. And you can’t help but fall in love with the main character, even though his acting is about as rough as blood drenched sand-paper.

The story revolves around a pool hustler who wants to go straight. But as it is with anyone with a passion and a talent, you can’t keep a shark away from the kiddie pool. The movie has certain fun hustling games and a really clever sense about itself as a whole. Lots of faces, as well. With witty dialogue, Christopher Walken, excellent camera work, Christopher Walken, a kicking sound track and a special appearance by Christopher Walken, this movie kicks.

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#3.  Six-String Samurai

I feel I’m kind of stretching it on this one, since I honestly have always thought this movie to be a pretty damn good piece of film. It wasn’t until I showed the movie to someone in great anticipation of them liking it as much as I do and their laughter and facial expressions were all I needed to realize that some people don’t appreciate post-apocalyptic, sword-wielding, Buddy Holly Rock n Roll, samurai films. And now I know that it’s not for everyone… fuckers.

The movie is so much fun. Set in an alternate time-line now (back in the 1950s the Russians launched the nukes causing World War III) In the wake of disaster, the only city left standing was Las Vegas, where Elvis became king, quite literally. Now, in the 1990s, the King is dead and all the rock n roll wannabes are coming out of the corners to claim the crown in Las Vegas, one of the, Buddy Holly and his katana. They never say his name directly but it’s pretty freaking obvious.

The charm of the film is the concept that it looks like it was made for $20,000 and they stretched the dime to the last drop. It’s really a fun ride and some pretty hip tunes on the sound track as well.

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#2. Sky High (2005)

This is in reference to the Disney live action movie, and not the Japanese film about coming back from the dead to revenge your murder (which is a dynamite film to boot). The movie plays on my desires as a kid… super heroes, cute, high school crushes, buses that fly, and of course, glow sticks. The movie is funny and heart-touching, and I can honestly say that this and Coraline would have been my top 2 films had I been a kid now.

The story is pretty tame and pretty normal: kid has no powers, parents are super hero gods, parents disappointed that kid has no powers, then kid gets powers, saves school from falling out of the sky, foils nefarious plot, friend turns into a Guinea pig. I have seen this plot so many times it makes my head spin.

It’s cute and clever and the only movie other than Star Wars, Snatch, or Yojimbo that I have ever watched 3 times in one night, back to back with itself.

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#1. Bring It On (2000)

This has been one of my favorite guilty pleasures forever now. Well, at least 9 years. The script is fucking perfect. Actually perfect. The dialogue is really, really well thought out and marvelously scripted. But the movie is cheesy and corny as they come, and that’s why I love it.
It’s funny, quirky, and heart-tugging. It never slows down where most movies do and it’s so re-watchable that I can often watch it twice a month, a true feat indeed. Now, don’t go thinking that the whole series is good just because the first is. I watched the 2nd in the series hoping that the producers and the new director would see what magic the first one had and try to reinvent that in their formula, but sadly they do what most Hollywood assholes do… take a huge shit all over it.
Lovable and memorable, Bring It On (part 1) will make you want to cheer, cheer, cheer, “I’m sexy, I’m cute. I’m popular to boot. I’m bitchin’, great hair, The boys all love to stare. I’m wanted, I’m hot. I’m everything you’re not. I’m pretty, I’m cool. I dominate this school. Who am I? Just guess. Guys wanna touch my chest. I’m rocking, I smile. And many think I’m vile. I’m flying, I jump. You can look but don’t you hump. Whooh! I’m major, I roar. I swear I’m not a whore. We cheer and we lead. We act like we’re on speed. Hate us cuz we’re beautiful, But we don’t like you either. We’re cheerleaders… We are cheerleaders!”

(This was from memory so it might not be completely accurate, so sorry B.I.O. purists.)

For the past year I have been following James Cameron’s Avatar with little to very little interest. All I ever heard was how much money it was using to make the thing. Looks like some of the money might pay off… Check out the finally-released teaser.

Avatar - Theatrical Trailer

One of my absolute favorite books in the world is a comic book from Image Comics called The Walking Dead. If you have yet to start on this monster of story telling, you have been missing out. Why is it so damn good? Well, for starters, it’s not your average run of the mill zombie eat everything in site kinda story. The story focuses on the evolution of the people left alive and how they change, stay the same and how they clutch on to their humanity in a world gone to hell. In short, it’s fucking amazing and the 2nd best zombie story I have ever seen (next to World War Z).

Finally, it would seem that Hollywood is taking notice of the books that truly deserve to be adapted (other than GI Joe and tripe that litters our theaters). Frank Darabont, director of the “Green Mile,” “Shawshank Redemption” and “The Mist” has fallen for the zombie lore, and truly, who better to have behind the wheel of this story? He has pitched the story to AMC and dibs are being sunken into. AMC’s senior vp of programing Joel Stillverman says that the tv show will stay faithful to the graphic novels.

“This is not about zombies popping out of closets,” Stillerman told Variety. “This is a story about survival, and the dynamics of what happens when a group is forced to survive under these circumstances. The world is portrayed in a smart, sophisticated way.”

Let’s hope so.

If you have yet to read this bad boy, do yourself a favor and pick up the first book today.

Some promos shot by the guys at Film Munkey (and I got to help out) talking about how they are going to the Chicago Comic Con this weekend.

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Hey all you Junk Filmers.  I and the Film Munkey crew will be going to the Chicago Comic Con next weekend (August 6th - 9th, 2009) and we will be interviewing people, talking film, and all over just having a good time.  If you’d like to come and meet up with us, shoot us an email or just look for the Film Munkey shirts and the guys with the cameras.  I would love to meet anyone who has watched the show or read this blog.

In other news, I am rocking out to see Funny People.  I hope it’s better than 40 Year Old Virgin.  G’night!